Ups and Downs of Trust Building: Trust earned and lost over time.

Yesterday, I spoke to Beth about trust. Recently Dave and I allowed Beth to stay in the house alone while Dave and I went for walks in our neighborhood.  She’s been irritated toward me and I asked her why and she said because I didn’t trust her to stay home alone for longer periods of time.

I told her that trust was something that could go up and down depending on what a person did.  Trust could be earned and lost over time.

Backstory:
The other night we Continue reading

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Do I Stay or Do I Go? (Round 2)

Dave and I through the years have both struggled with the question –Should I stay? Should I Go?

There have been a few critical pieces that contributed to us staying together, 1) our Christian faith and values 2) engaging in couple’s therapy and 3) engaging in individual therapy. By engagement I mean taking to heart what we learned about ourselves, each other and our relationship style; applying strategies; taking risks to do new things; bottom line–doing the hard work to change things for the better.

I just wish we got help sooner.  By waiting until we desperately needed help, our marriage had Continue reading

A Panic Attack

At a staff meeting my boss shared news that shocked the entire staff.  I couldn’t breathe.  I took deep breaths–but my lungs felt void of air.  The room felt heavy, somber. Tears filled my eyes rolling down my cheeks.  My boss looked at me, knowing my background and said, “looks like that hit a nerve.”  I nodded and said I was okay. She shared her own worries.

I continued to tell myself to take deep breaths. My air supply returned and I stopped tearing.  The staff meeting continued as usual. My throat tightened as I commanded myself not to cry, not to feel. Continue reading